Hello, Dear Reader.
Welcome to the first of (hopefully) many entries in the FEATURES section. In these posts, you can expect everything from series focused on a genre, director, etc, to a looser, more socially-minded look at some old favorites.
More than this, however, this first entry should give an idea of how much I will go into a film I'm passionate about. It is taken from several years back, while I was a junior in highschool. I estimate very few people have read it, and those who have only did because I asked if they would.
I will briefly preface this post with a few simple facts of its composition:
-A good while before initially viewing the movie, Taxi Driver was one of a handful of movies that my loving folks deemed "a bit too much," and this was having already sat through heavy-hitters like the Terminator films and Die Hard with my dad...so, of course, I was curious.
-At the time, I was struggling a bit in connecting with people. Not in the sense that I didn't have friends. I had plenty. And many were better than I felt I deserved...and that was part of the problem. Adolescence often marks the start of a period of cynicism, and I wasn't an exception. Things lost their sheen, and the simplest of human flaws started to seem absolutely reprehensible. In short, already being awkward around most people, the touch of additional hostility didn't boost my confidence.
-Still, I feel this composition sums up how experiencing movies like Taxi Driver helped put things in perspective. Perhaps it would be a bit much to say this movie saved my life, as I still don't think my rendition of the "falling apart dance" would have been nearly as severe as others' renditions, but it sure did give me enough to stand back and breath. Anyway, just expect some heavier stuff in this than you would from a standard review.
welp, with that, I hope you enjoy this spewing of conscience from 2011 Dylan...
*This piece was originally published on February 11th 2011 as a Facebook Note.
Listen you fuckers. You screw-heads. Here is a man who would not take it anymore.
A man who stood up against the scum, the cunts, the dogs, the filth, the shit; here is someone who stood up.
Here is.....
When you are alone, it's amazing how cynical you can get. One minute, you haven't a care in the world; the day's over for you, and you have the night to yourself; a night to indulge yourself in your harmless little niche (sleep, movies, friends. the good stuff), while others, as you are strongly aware, are out and about, possibly getting into things that you wouldn't think twice about passing up. Soon, when this process has repeated itself one too many times, you start thinking more than relaxing.
Perhaps you start thinking of the drug craze.
Who do these morons think they are? How do they easily get away with selling this shit to everybody? Why do people even buy it to begin with?
No simpleton, you soon come to understand that the simple use of these substances is not the major problem, but the pain, the addiction, the misfortune, even the false focus of authority that comes with the field (weed's horrible and causes chaos. booze are fine though....).Who are you, drinkers, smokers, pot-heads, junkies, salesmen, to tell our generation what's legal, harmful, illegal, etc?
Even more important, as you realize that these principals apply to a number of organizations, how does any industry involving the misery and deaths of thousands even get off the ground?
Maybe you think of violence.
Why can't we all just get along?
A tad too general to answer, you dig farther into it:
Why do people feel the need to fight? To posture themselves? To get "respect" or "power" with force?
Why can't society distinguish a genuine issue of violence (or any issue for that matter) from fantasy (As in, not real. As in, fiction. Movies. Books. Music))
Why is police brutality, juvenille warfare, and the slaughter of civilians in foreign nations put on the shelf in favor of what the president wears in an interview (yes, people find this important), or how a celebrity has been arrested for public indecency...again?
You may even ponder over Sex, be it as a whole or the physical act of. The amount of stress the subject causes you depends on your own circumstances; that said, it will overpower anyone, down to the way they look at the world around them. The lonely, especially, get the worst out of this aspect of the human race.
The topic comes in many forms, from the ironically innocent and youthful dreams...
Do we like them?
Do they like us?
Are we even on the basis of friendship?
Should we bring it up?
Do we look good enough for them?
Will we ever get that kiss?
Will we ever get that date?
Can we reach our goals with a little patience, or perhaps persistance?
to the stinging exposure to reality...
They've done it, this young??
Who's done it, and with with whom??
How do we feel about this?..
It's wrong...right??
Or is it natural to, at this age of great physical and emotional change, give into our taboo temptations..?
Should we have done it by now??
Are we worth doing it with??
Why is this making our skin crawl??
Why can't we think of anything else????
And then, last of all, the inevitably mixed whirlwind of passion, confusion, jealousy, hate, regret, pity, guilt, arrogance...chaos of the troubled soul...
What do they have that we don't???
Why have we been tossed aside after all of our commitment??
Are we not entitled to a small amount of happiness or satisfaction after years of attention and concern?
Why are we so angry???
Why are we obssessing over this???
Do we really think this matters??
Is this really worth putting everything else on hold for???
...yes??maybe.....absolutely.....?
Why don't they seem bothered by this???
Do our feelings have any meaning to them whatsoever???
This is their fault! Not ours!
Have they no sense of our pain???
HAVE WE NOT TRIED EVERYTHING IN OUR POWER TO MAKE IT KNOWN TO THEM WHAT IS GOING THROUGH OUR MIND!!!!???
..........................................come to think of it...no. not by a longshot.
We've tried, yes.
But how well? How Composed? How often?.... They're not to blame...
If anything, we've noone to blame but ourselves.
Our alleged suffering is a product of our arrogance.
Our stupidity.
Our inability to think straight.
Our inability to connect with a select few whom we admire....
...........................................................What don't they have that we do, besides failure?
Before you know it, this cruel and vicious vortex of social despair consumes you. Your entire being obsesses over it, whether you know it or not.
The results of such vary, indeed...
I've had the fortune of only resorting to that first image, on account of the admittedly fortunate relationships with my family and friends, to whom i owe great thanks.
As for the topics and angst written above these photos, unfortunately, all of them have gone through my head at least once (among other things), and I'm willing to admit it. It has recently dawned on me that in order to keep these feelings under control, in order to avoid the other consequences that come from them, I must share them.
Which finally brings me back to Taxi Driver.
I'm not here to deem this film anything more than what it is. While I do consider it a masterpiece, a landmark of cinematic narrative, and a superbly acted/composed character study, it is still a film. There are those who will not like it. There are those who may be offended by the content. Even those who simply find it mediocre. And that is completely fine with me.
What I do wish to stress, however, is what the film represents, in both its own focus and its relevance in our society.
Following the character of Travis Bickle is very much like stepping into the shoes of a stranger; yet, simultaneously, it is like experiencing the life of the loner that we've either seen, met, or read about in the newspapers. We come to know what makes him tick, while we never truly know the reasons behind his detatched view of society (save brief mentioning of his service in Vietnam).
It is through the actions of this familiar stranger that we come to understand the mind behind the violent, the distant, and those brimming with angst. We find ourselves relating to Travis' disliking of the sex, crime, and hatred on the streets (despite our hesitation to express such in real life).
His obsession with Betsy mirrors every man's desire for romance. The idealization of that one particular person to share our innermost feelings with. The constant paranoia of where they are. What they think of us. What they're doing. As well as the sudden surges of hatred for percieved offenses that we can't really explain.
When deprived of the the love that he needs, his hunger to be a figure of significance magnifies. He needs someone to help. Someone to protect. Someone to save. When he stumbles upon the teen prostitute Iris, he sees an oppurtunity to make use of his life and satisfy his natural yearnings for significance.
It is from this sexual and spiritual frustration that his violent tendencies spring forth. We've all had bad thoughts. Impure thoughts. Thoughts involving those we fancy being taken advantage of by generic scum. For men especially, these images invoke animalistic disgust and rage. And such can erupt in fury (as the film's climax suggests, albeit exceptionally chaotic.)
Viewing this film has been an evocative experience, to say the least. Not too distant from works such as Catcher in the Rye, Taxi Driver seems to capture the essence of the human condition in a way that works.
Which brings me to a conclusion of sorts. This movie has garnered as much controversy as it has praise, due to its graphic and lurid depiction of life. But that's the catch: Life can be lurid. Life can be violent. And life can be cruel. Films such as this are often kept from the eyes of today's youth, of fear that it could have damaging effects.
This could not be farther from the truth.
Everyone should be encouraged to watch these films, for it is this raw, uncut analysis that keeps the less glamorious ways of the world in perspective. In the case of Mr. Scorsese's magnum opus, society must learn that not everyone gets the kind of life that our culture promises. There are those who are beaten to the ground by the cruelty of human folly. People who are whipped around by the arms into the cold, hard surface of reality.
And when they have taken too much, they may very well act out in undesirable ways in an attempt to prove they are in fact alive, and deserve more out of life than a personal hell.
Being well into the twilight of teen life, the last few years have been spotted with unchecked confusion and emotions. And it wasn't until viewing this film that I was able to step back long enough to realize the kind of damage that can be caused, and has been caused, by things as basic as built-up stress and frustration.
So, if any of this cryptic spewing of conscience has struck you as eye-opening, if any of this has made you think of those whose minds are not always at peace, I highly recommend viewing Taxi Driver at least once. Because if we want to understand the misunderstood, if we want to ease the minds of the lost, and if we want to grasp the concept of pure isolation, we must first get an idea of what fuels the proverbial flame of loneliness; following characters of this caliber, in my opinion, is a genuine first step...
Taxi Driver is available in a two-disc collector's edition, which is packed with insightful extras on the movie's production, philosophy, and legacy.
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